Monday, December 31, 2012

2012 your Shoulders are Big Enough!!!

Hey Boos! Today is the last day of 2012, and we will be ushering in 2013. (SN: Time sure flies when your stuck in the same place.) Every year we make resolutions that we promise to keep, but we don't(lol), and the  next year we are making the same resolutions.  I decided I would do something different to end my year. Instead, of waiting for a new year to make a resolution, I decided to just leave things in 2012, so my 2013 will Shine Bright like a Diamond (in my Rihanna voice.) I am claiming my best life for 2013.

I am leaving a lot of things for 2012, but she is big enough to handle the weight. So here goes my depression, lack of forgiveness, childhood hurts, insecurities, and so much more. I have carried these weights on me for so many years that they are now apart of my everyday life, and I can't shake them off. I have wore a mask for so many years, that I don't recognize my own face. 2012 you can keep the mask, because the real me would like to show up. Happy, Sad, Fat, Small, Up or Down. I am showing up.
My hurts have not only affected my life, but the life of my husband and children. My fears have crippled me from allowing my children to truly be children, because I trust no one with them. It has made my husband play the role of father to me many days , because I needed someone to take care of me. So 2012 I am leaving this for you as well, I decided I want to be healed and freed from my past.
I know that freedom, healing, and wholeness cost, but I am so tired of being in this space that I am willing to pay the cost. People that have hurt me have moved on with their lives, and I am stuck in the same place I was in 24 yrs ago. India.Arie sings a song called get it together, and there's a part to the song that says " And now you only have yourself to blame. If you continue to live this way. Get it together." This is my song for 2013.

I know that I have continued to live in pain, because forgiveness is so hard when the people you trust have hurt you. But this pain will stay in 2012. I know the journey isn't going to be easy, but I am so ready, because being healed has to be better than this. 2013 I welcome you. I welcome love, forgiveness, acceptance, friendship, success, truth, trust, healing, knock downs, and get ups. I also welcome the chance to grieve the little girl that lost her innocence to early. I am grateful to God that he has made me a survivor and I realize that I am not a victim anymore.
To everyone that reads this and assist in my healing whether it be good or bad, Thank You. I pray that God helps you find your healing along with me, and that you are able to leave your unwanted baggage for 2012.
Until the next blog. Miracles & Blessings


Friday, December 7, 2012

Infecting the World * Smile

Hey Boos!!! I recentley told you that there would be changes to the blog, well here is one of the changes. I love reading blogs, and there is a blog I read named Consider Me Lovely, the writer on this blog is Rocquelle. Shout out to Rocquelle, a friend in my head. Anyhoo, every Friday she does a posting about things that make her smile. (SN: Smiles and laughs are infectious. If you smile at someone they smile back. When others see you laugh, they start laughing. If you don't believe it try it and see what happens.) I thought that it was very inspiring and asked her if I could be a bitter and bite her! She was sweet and told me that it wouldn't be a problem, so today is my first smile post. Our lives are so busy and complicated, sometimes we forget about the things that make us smile and bring us joy. I hope these post will inspire you, and remind you it's the little things in life that make you smile when everything else seems to be going crazy.
Trying black lipsticks, and realizing everything doesn't look good on me. Hard pill to!
Finding a rose gold watch at Target for $13.00.
Starting my healthy eating before the new year with a green smoothie.
Losing 5lbs since starting. YAAAAA!!!!

Finding great boots at Target, and resisting the urge to buy them. Until, they were too cute I have to have them.

Jello cake that my Grandma told me how to make.

My baby girl who has her own fashion style.

Having a girls night with friends that ended in an Adult Toy Shop.

Doing movie week on Instagram, and the comments made about "Baby Boy".
Please share with me the things that make you smile, because as the song says "when you smile the whole world smiles with you."
Until the next blog. Miracles & Blessings

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

So your back from OuterSpace!!!

Happy Hump Day!!! This seems like a great day to return. I know that I have been away, but I felt like after Hurricane Sandy I needed to take a break, because there were more important things going on in the world besides me. I know that I do like all things to be about, but I know they aren't so I took a little break to get some clarity. However, I have returned and with a different out look for the blog so there will be changes, but good changes.

I have a few pictures from the time I was gone. I felt like since I must get dressed I might as well look good. If you are following me on Instagram (SN: Instagram is my new favorite addiction, and I am not ashamed to say it.) then you have viewed some of these pictures already.

I loved my paisley skinny pants and I got to thrift  in some great leggings.
It took me forever to wear the jeans now I want to wear them once a week, but I don't.
Finally wore my wedge sneakers, and they made me feel real bad ass.
Bought this skirt in NY and I feel the same way about it now that I did when I purchased!

Had to wear this fur vest that I got last year for $14 and my election day dance.

My great blazer that I bought when thrifting. If you don't remember check out the HappyThrift Day blog. I tried to do the click her to view the pic, but it didn't work. If you know how to do it help a sista out.

Shout out to the Soldiers, while wearing my Dereon military jacket.
 Since I was gone several events took place, so let me get them all out at the end of  my speech like an acceptance speak at an awards show. Happy Halloween, hope you ate as much candy as possible and brought out the kid inside of you. Congratulations Mr. President, so proud of him and the American people for just voting. Happy Thanksgiving, I hope that your bellies were filled with food and your hearts were filled with love from being with your families. I pray that Black Friday didn't make you crazy and you got lots of great purchases.

Until the next blog. Miracles & Blessings.